The Habit of Leaving Yourself

There’s a moment most people miss.

It happens quickly.
Almost before you’re aware of it.

Something feels uncomfortable…
and you’re already somewhere else.

In your head.
In your to-do list.
In your phone.
In fixing, solving, analysing.

It’s subtle.
But it’s consistent.

And over time, it becomes automatic.

This is where nervous system regulation often begins to matter more than mindset.

Many high-functioning people don’t fall apart when something feels uncomfortable.

They move.

Not physically, necessarily.

But internally.

Into thinking.

Into doing.

Into distraction.

It can look like:

• analysing the situation instead of feeling it
• getting busy the moment something feels off
• reaching for your phone without thinking
• trying to “solve” the discomfort quickly

On the surface, it looks productive.

Capable, even.

But underneath, something else is happening.

You’re leaving your body.

This is where most people get it wrong.

They assume it’s a mindset issue:

• A lack of discipline.
• An inability to “sit with things.”

But often, this pattern is physiological.

Your nervous system has learned that certain sensations don’t feel safe to stay with.

So it redirects you.

Into thinking.

Into action.

Into anything that creates distance from the feeling.

This is a form of nervous system regulation, just not one that restores you.

It’s protective. It’s familiar. And it keeps you from having to stay with what feels uncertain.

When this becomes your default, a few things start to happen.

Your thinking narrows.
Everything becomes something to solve.

Your body stays in low-level tension.
Even when nothing is “wrong.”

Rest becomes difficult.
Because stillness brings you back to what you’ve been moving away from.

And emotionally, there’s a quiet build-up:

• Unprocessed reactions.
• Unfelt sensations.
• A constant sense of being slightly “on.”

Not overwhelmed.
But not fully settled either.

The shift doesn’t start with forcing yourself to stay.

It starts with noticing where you go.

Because right now, most of this happens automatically.

Before you even realise it.

Awareness begins to change your nervous system regulation by bringing you back into choice.

Not all at once.
But gradually.

And more consistently over time.

You don’t need a full practice.

Just a few small interruptions in your day.

Next time something feels uncomfortable, notice:

Where do I go first?

• Into thinking?
• Into doing?
• Into distraction?

Pause there.

Then bring your attention to your body.

Not to change anything.

Just to notice.

Where do you feel it?

Tightness?

Restlessness?

A pull to move away?

Stay for one breath longer than you usually would.

That’s enough.

The body often isn’t asking for a solution.

It’s asking not to be left.

If you recognise this pattern, this is the work we gently move through inside Come Home to Your Body.

Not by forcing stillness.

But by creating enough safety for you to stay.

If this topic resonated with you, you may also enjoy:

• Burnout is Rarely the First Problem. The Nervous System Load Behind High Performance
• Why High Performers Are Often the Least Supported: A Nervous System Perspective
• Nervous System Practices for Leaders Who Can’t Switch Off

Yvette Puchert works with people who are used to holding a lot.

They’re capable. Reliable. Often the one others turn to. But over time, that way of being starts to live in the body as tension, pressure, and a constant sense of staying “on.”

Her work focuses on how the nervous system carries this load and how it begins to shape clarity, decision-making, and the ability to switch off.

With a background in corporate environments, she understands how responsibility builds, and how easily it becomes internal.

Yvette now supports individuals in restoring capacity by working with the body as the entry point, not just the mind.

Learn more about Yvette.